Abandoned Past
by SnowyItake
Summary: Kaito was an orphan stuck in an Orphanage who conducts multiple experiments on the children, including immortality. Kaito broke out of that place, achieving freedom, but at the sacrifice at his only friend, Gakupo. After he fainted, and woke up, he would find the world to be a very different place.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Kaito or anything that infringes copyright... But the plot belongs to me

A somewhat Gakupo x Kaito fanfiction~

My entire body felt as heavy as lead, having to drag my entire body along the grass irritated both my skin and wounds greatly, leaving trails of blood in my wake.

My face had a deep wound from a cut I got when I crawled through a small hole in the barbed fence, the merciless wires piercing deep into my undernourished skin, and a thick liquid surfaced on my ghastly pale cheeks. On my cracked lips, I could taste the all too familiar iron-rich liquid. The scent, the taste, the feel, the sight of blood was all too much common for me, it has already almost become an everyday sight to me.

My hands, my legs, were filled with numerous wounds that cut deep into my flesh, so deep that I could see the hard and white ceramic poking out from within. Blood was dripping in such quantity; I could feel my consciousness already slipping away from my grasp, like a rock perched on a razor sharp tip of a rock, swaying ever so gently in the cold wind. If the draconian wind blew even a little harder, the rock will fall and asunder into countless uneven pieces.

I could feel a sharp pain shooting through my entire body at an uncanny speed every time I moved. A few of my bones were broken, I guessed. It wasn't that big of a deal yet, since it were just the elbow joint, a small ribcage bone, and a few finger bones. I should count myself lucky that my leg muscles are still tough enough to protect my precious bones such that I could still move. It was really nothing, except the jabs of pain sent through my nerves with each single painstaking took steps that I had apparently, gotten used to well.

My head is getting darker and dizzy as double images of boundless greenery started to appear in my vision. Although not even having the energy to make my brain work on escaping the forest, I still continued to step forward to nowhere, driven by the mere desire to escape.

But each step took made my head worse. I'm, already, halfway to my grave already…

It's too late.

Is this the end?

Is this any meaning to me escaping from that hideous place of hell?

Escaping to just die in the end?

Was this really what I wanted?

Questions bombarded my consciousness I had left which I had been trying my ultimate best to hold on to desperately.

The questions came tumbling out as my last breath drew near.

Death.

That mere cold and unfeeling word was able to struck me with a fear that I have never experienced before.

Do I really want this?

Do I really wished for my death?

I felt even my long empty and cold heart shook violently at what was going to happen next.

I had finally escaped from that place that doesn't even deserve a single alphabet of 'Happy Orphanage'.

They should have chosen a better name.

H.E.L.L would had fit it a lot, lot better.

The orphanage's defenses were as tight as expected, befitting of the name 'The impregnable and inescapable Prison'.

It seemed ridiculous to be even think about escape, let alone acting it out.

Every painful day was spent gazing longingly at the meadow and forest on the other side of the hell, the birds chirping happily.

It seemed so free outside.

It was captivating.

I crumbled like a flimsy sheet of paper next to a huge oak tree, panting heavily and gasping for the fresh and oxygenated air of the forest.

The blood trail left behind by me shone softly in the setting sun, glowing in colours of orange and red, like an enchanting spell.

So I'm going to die like this?

My conscious fading away rapidly as seconds passed.

I bet they think I'm dead, seeing that nobody had been sent to chase.

I guess they were right huh.

They could just take another poor lamb that would be forced to succumb to them, instead of saving a useless me who retaliated violently against them. Even an idiot could see the better choice.

They weren't wrong anyway. They were unmistakably and painfully accurate.

I'm going to draw my last breath any time soon.

My chest heaved up and down, in sync with my short and deep breaths.

I couldn't even feel the pain that had been eating away at my consciousness anymore.

Pain, huh? What a cruel joke.

I could have laughed at my own pathetic state.

After escaping the hell where death was surely inevitable, I had just chosen to hurry my own death by attempting to escape.

And I even dragged _him_ into this whole irreversible mess.

I'm the worst trash huh?

The best trash that ever existed.

No.

Trash couldn't even begin to describe me.

It would even be too much of a great honor to call me trash.

I'm nothing.

Just the name 'Kaito', the big big big big idiot that had escaped to eventually die shortly after.

I could only…. Be nothing…. Someone that shouldn't have been… born.

Why, tell me…. Why was…..even…I…

Someone… like me… born for?

The idiot me… that….was…..

abandoned from….birth…

It ….would… really…

Have ….been…

…. Better..

…. If I ….

... had…

Died.

A blinding flash of memory zoomed past my barely awake consciousness…

-Flashback-

'Gakupo! Gakupo!' I screamed out his name like someone calling out for the name of their lost beloved ones, their only light.

He was also, a speck of light to us in the abyss of darkness.

I screamed and screamed like there was no tomorrow, as he was dragged away ruthlessly back into the orphanage.

The guards looked at me like I was some piece of dirty garbage that should be buried deep within the dump to not be seen.

A dirty existence was denounced and disregarded.

My throat was aching and throbbing badly, but still, I continued to scream even though I knew it wouldn't change anything.

The guard grabbed me by the tip of his fingers, a plain and undisguised disgust plastered onto his face. My hands flapped everywhere desperately, as though trying to drag him with me in this futile escape.

My voice was completely hoarse until the guard decided that I was far too dam noisy for my own good and slapped my mouth tight. I could feel my lips swelling like sausages, but still, my cracking voice continued to scream out his name at the top of my lungs, seeping through that guards' rough fingers that held my mouth in captive.

Why did I screamed like it was the end of the world?

When his smiling face would never appear in front of me anymore.

I wanted to save him.

But the guard grabbed onto me with vice like strength, unwillingly to let me go.

No. That wasn't the reason.

I was just fearful.

I was selfish.

I didn't want to go back there anymore. That hellish place.

With that thinking, I abandoned you, just like how my nonexistent parents abandoned me.

I had the strength to help him, but I knew very well. I would never be able to escape again if I went back there.

I squinted my eyes shut, pondering heavily about whether to save or not. Beads of sweats covered my entire forehead as my decision was unclear. Freedom and Regret, or back to the old Hell life which I always hated and wanted to run away from. My choice had a predictable end to both of them. A life of regret or a life of hell.

'Kaito! Run and don't come back anymore!' A yell that shook away all my indecisiveness.

I bit into the hand grabbing onto me with all my strength, and the guard yelped in pain. His grip had only released for a split second, but that was enough for me to make a break for it. As my leg muscles kept on running and running, my head was nonetheless shouting without mercy at my useless and pitiful self who could only run away and at the back of my mind, it was telling me to run away, and yet, a desire to save Gakupo appeared out of nowhere.

I should have been happy that I escaped from that hell.

_Should have._

But why am I feeling this way at this point of time?

It was already,too late to regret my choice or return anymore.

I'm already on the path of no return.

Running away, on this path of freedom in my grasp, with nothing but empty regrets awaiting my arrival at the end of the path.

It was hard to breath.

Something stuck in my throat was the reason.

The heavy pounding of my feet on the cold and hard Earth ground..

Heartbeat raising rapidly.

A splitting headache.

Swallowing my saliva.

The cool atmosphere.

A wet sensation in my eyes…

I will never forget this feeling.

Never.

Not until my death.

-End Flaskback-

End of Chapter 1


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Kaito or anything that infringes copyright except the plot

-Flashback-

'Kaito, let's play together tomorrow again!' Gakupo flashed his innocent and naïve smile which attracted everyone's attention. None of the kids, not even the adults, were able to smile in such a dazzling way as him. His smile was like a gem, sparkling white and everyone loved him. He was a symbol of purity and light to the prisoners, but the polar opposites were given by the mean adults who loathed him with all their might. They tend to make his duties harsher, and give him lesser rewards. They always tried to make his life hell, which they did to us, but it was a lot worse for him. I can't even imagine the suffering, the stinging pain, the cruel sensations, and tortures he had went through.

But even so.

He was still able to smile like normal.

It wasn't an exaggeration that he was like an archangel that pulled us all, and me, from the depts of hells.

He who had the most beautiful lavender hair that shrouded his puny body like a cover that shielded the darkness from himself, giving him an otherworldly glow. He had equally sparkling eyes that contained his iron strong will to resist to this darkness that had failed to envelop him in. His soul of the purest white that even this hell couldn't taint.

He who was so beautiful.

Yet…

I disliked him deep in my heart. He was the total opposite of me.

My heart filled with hatred, vengeance, black was my soul.

Yet his heart was filled with acceptance and purity.

But I know somewhat deep down, I knew I didn't hate him.

It certainly wasn't easy to hate him.

I couldn't help but gaze wondrously at him, admiring his sheer strength to break free from this hell.

I had already given up and submitted to this cruel and twisted fate. But he still continued to fight bravely like a valiant warrior, wielding no shield but two trusty swords. One sword was his unbelievable will, one was his unbreakable belief. He didn't need a shield. It wasn't necessary. He would not crumble.

I gave him a glare, and walked off crossing my arms. How was he able to jest around every day, treating all his horrifying many injuries as nothing? How could he not break yet?

Why?

But I was unable to find out the answer.

I was afraid to know.

Why was I afraid to know, I wonder?

He was so beautiful and pure.

He was out of my hand's reach.

-Flashback End-

It was warm and comfortable.

Those were my first thoughts as my consciousness started to stir slightly.

It wasn't the familiar deathly cold hard floor that I woke up to every time. It was a warm and soft thing that my body is resting well on.

A stunning white ray of color stung my eyes sharply as I tried to open my heavy eyelids, and I quickly squint my blinded eyes.

Why was it so bright? So warm?

Where am I?

Am I dead?

But I felt like this was the real authentic human world, not the heaven or hell so greatly spoken of.

As my memories started to flow back to me, I remembered him.

Gakupo.

Where is he?!

Gakupo, where are you?

The familiar damp sensation started to form in my eyes again as short flashes of that dazzling smiles that seemed out of reach started to go through my mind again, threatening more tears to form.

'Are you awake?' A smooth and clear voice ringed from somewhere on my right. It was a very talented voice for singing. He would make it far if he's a singer.

My eyelids fluttered open, like a butterfly that just emerged from its cocoon and had just experienced its maiden flight. My eyes had already gotten use to the sudden brightness that contrasted greatly from usual. It was a brightness that I had longed for.

Feeling jittery and grateful, and yet filled with remorse and regret, I looked around the rather spacious room bleached mostly in classic black and velvet red. There were whites blended in to contrast the deep and full colors.

Pushing the despondent thoughts of Gakupo to the back of my mind, I looked around curiously for the source of that talented voice. It was first priority to find out where I was first, before letting myself sink into a sea of depression afterwards.

A small bedside lamp sat lightly on a white bedside cabinet. A luxurious white bed and a thick blanket of the same color were the source of my warm comfort that had smoothen my tense feelings.

A painting of a beautiful lady in a pleasant meadow overseeing a crystal-clear blue sea was hang on the wall in front of me. It was surely a grand work of art, but somehow, it radiates a sense of intense loneliness, as though the lady was cut off from the rest of the world, alone in her own breathtaking space.

Somehow, instead of being all wary from being in an unfamiliar place, I felt at ease like it was home, and safe.

I mustered every strength in my body to attempt the five stars difficult task of propping myself up against a pillow, but a hand full of warmth gently gave me a hand.

That's when I see him.

A petite, heart-shaped face with ruby eyes filled with anxiousness came right a few centimeters from my own face. He then clapped my hand in between both of his slender ones, like a worried sick mother, gazing at me with those same troubled eyes. His sweet smelling white hair brush over my sickly pale skin. It was soft as silk, light as feather, thin as needles, shiny like crystals. The dream perfect hair.

And a face that lacked nothing, with a bonus talented voice thrown into the mixture with perfectly measured ingredients of talents.

He was like a prince that popped out from those childish fairy tales and the likes that I had found boring, since they were unrealistic. Too unrealistic.

A beauty and talent that could outmatch any, second to none.

That was just how perfect, no. Not even perfect could find a place to begin describing him. I could almost imagine him in a picturesque scenery, riding on the horse of the purest white snow, his hair gently blown by the wind….

'Hey, you there?' He waved his long digits in front of my face.

I was immediately snapped back to reality with a heavy dull thud on the back of my face.

'Uwah?!' So close!

I could feel my face heating up slightly already. I quickly looked down, not wanting him to see my face.

'Be more careful!' He massaged my bruise a little before deciding it was okay and stopped. He crawled off the bed to my relief, but instead of being entirely on the bed, he had merely chosen to sit at the side of the bed.

With my strength slowly recovering to my body, I sat up straight again after making sure my face wasn't as hot anymore.

'How is your body?' He shot the question immediately. A straight-forward guy huh. He observed my expressions and actions with eyes similar to that of an eagle hunting for a prey. It just gave me that feeling.

Anything I do would surely be picked up. Thus, I lie back onto the bed, facing the ceiling instead. His intense gaze was too much too handle, not in a sexual way of course.

I tried to move my body in greater motions. It was fine. My bones have healed, my deep wounds have healed properly, new skin has been replenished. Judging from my recovery, I must have been asleep for about one week at most.

I had astounding recovery speed after all.

Not that I hated it.

But it did certainly made me sound like I was some vampire from legends and myths.

And I'm certainly NOT.

'Good,' a short and sweet reply. I sat up properly and started to peel my bandages off while avoiding his eyes. It seemed that my bandages were replaced regularly over my span of sleep. The bandages looked new despite my week's worth of sleep.

'What were you doing along and so badly wounded in such a deserted forest?' His voice was even sharper when he asked this question.

I expected that question.

There was a slight hint of suspicion in that question. Not that it wasn't unreasonable. Where on earth will you find a person in a pool of blood, unconscious with many wounds in such a deserted area? If it was somebody else, I'm positive they will be overcame with fear and turn tails and ran away with their tails in between their legs.

Yet he saved my worthless life and gave me a comfy place to rest.

Just like…Gakupo.

But I can't reply to his question, not even when he's the benevolent savior that had held on to this suspicious stranger's last breath.

The orphanage had forced us all to take a death vow to protect the orphanage's secrets. If any details were to be revealed, even the slightest insignificant information would cause my very death itself.

I regretfully kept my mouth shut, and continued in my task of unraveling the bandages.

'Okay.' He said shortly after gently, sensing my unwillingness to say.

He really is too kind.

'Are you sure you can take off your bandages?'

'Yes…' I replied, showing my perfectly healthy arm to him where I had just finished the tiresome task of taking off the bandages.

In a state of utter shock and amazement, I expected him to be afraid of my tremendous recovery speed-

'Wah! You recover very fast!' He said in a child-like voice, grabbing onto my arm and examined it like it was some great treasure. He was like a young child that was merely just curious and interested in any new things it came across.

Blushing up to the tip of my ears, I yanked my hand away and turned my back on him cruelly.

'I'm sorry for my disrespectful act,' He quickly apologized, getting off the bed and standing next to it instead.

You don't have to be sorry…. You had nothing to be sorry about.

I wanted to say that, but they were words that were hard to spit out.

'My name is Akiko Gak'

'And I'm Lan!' A random young voice that popped out of nowhere belonged to a young blond bouncing up and down on the couch in my room. He certainly is full of energy. I can't help but chuckle.

When was he there anyway?

I turned again, interested in the young boy. He had blond hair that shined like stars upon the nights, he had the same red eyes as Akiko, but his had a more mischievous feel to it.

Both their faces wore exactly the same expression.

A kind and gentle smile.

'I'm Kaito… No surname….' I mumbled in a soft voice unlike usual, a little taken back by their attitude at a stranger.

Why were they so nice to me anyway?

'Welcome to the Gak mansion, Kaito-chan!' They both spread their arms in a welcoming position with the same exact grinning face that never seemed to lose its warmth.

At that moment, somewhere warm glowed in my heart, and a wet sensation formed in my eyes again, but it wasn't tears of sadness.

'O-okay…' I turned around to face them properly for the first time, and…

I smiled, for the first time in my life.

End of Chapter 2


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